A series of bizarre incidents has been sweeping the country like  wildfire, yet there does not seem to be any rhyme or reason to connect the happenings excepting on the level of mass consciousness.

It began when an elderly woman wearing a purple hat allegedly snatched the cell phone from a man in front of her in line at Staples in Branford, CT. According to eye witnesses, the cell phone flew across the aisle all by itself. Actually, it was only the owner of the phone, who was on the phone and speaking loudly at the time- unconcerned about anyone else hearing his conversation, who stated that the woman had grabbed the phone and flung it. Everyone else denied that she had been involved.

When interviewed, the woman said she was glad to see the device careening through the room, as she had been very annoyed by the rudeness of the man who was, at the time, dealing with the clerk and being checked out, yet still engaged in some kind of less-than-emergency conversation.

The man was outraged that an old person would behave so rashly, but police did not take him seriously, as the woman denied any such behavior, and no witnesses could be found to corroborate the man's story. The phone was damaged, but there did not seem to be enough evidence for insurance agents to become involved.

In the end, the police took the man to the station for further examination. He had become hysterical, screeching that people were bonking him with their umbrellas, claiming he had taken too much of their time with his crazy accusations. Again, no one came forward as witness.

Now it is being reported that similar incidents have been reported in New Jersey, Virginia, Louisiana, Florida, Minnesota, North Dakota, California, Wyoming, Colorado, and Kentucky. In each case, there has been "an old woman wearing a purple hat" blamed for the snatching and throwing of the cell phone, and each time, only the person who was actually on the phone at the time filed the report. Others on the scene always denied the happening.

Psychiatrists and psychics have been interviewed about this phenomenon. The consensus of opinion seems that this is a product of a kind of mass-mind conspiracy.

 "It's a hundredth monkey kind of thing," explained Dr. Robert Dogood of New Jersey State Institute for the Open Minded. "I believe that the old woman is a kind of holographic hallucination, created by the build up of agitation so many feel due to the intensity of the rudeness perpetrated by mobile phone addicts. Certainly many suffer from this malady, unawares that others who are being insulted by their rude public behavior are on the brink of losing their patience. Perhaps this one little old lady can save other phone abusers from incarceration for what rightfully deserves redress."

This news might have remained a point of amusement to the general public, but several of the latest incidents reported tell of the old lady appearing not in queues in public places, but in the car, completely by surprise, appearing suddenly, striking suddenly, and then disappearing before the cell phone fanatic suffers the accident that inevitably occurs. Until now, the accidents have been contained; that is to say, the damage has always been in the nature of a car swerving off the road, with no more than a bent fender in terms of damage, though the mobile phone addict most definitely is rethinking his wisdom about blabbing while driving.

Let us hope that this strange phenomenon subsides as soon as those mobile phone addicts wake up to the possibility of these experiences happening to them personally.