There once was a Great Cat that lived at the edge of a very wild woods. She spent her days caring for the woods and monitoring who would enter. She let the local villagers pass by without a growl, knowing they would only take what they needed for their families. She would become fierce and block the path of thieves who would use the woods for their own misdeeds. Over time, she became familiar with most of the locals and could tell their scents from miles away.

A princess, well really, The Princess from the village came to the woods often to sit in a pretty glen and read or just think. The Princess knew the Great Cat was nearby and would ask questions aloud to see if the Cat would speak with her. The Cat never did, but would sit and ponder the questions the Princess asked. One time, the Princess said “I wonder where all the birds go when it becomes cold here?” and the Great Cat thought about this for a long time and finally asked a passing bird. “We migrate to warmer climates. You should try it sometimes, the beaches are great,” replied the bird.

Even though the Cat had this information, she was wary of talking to the Princess. Humans appeared silly and ill equipped, and the Great Cat often felt very sorry for them. They seemed so vulnerable in the woods, and she sometimes saw them get hurt from their own stupidity. So, as curious as she was, as Cats often are, she kept her distance from the Princess and continued to eavesdrop.

One particularly beautiful day, the Princess entered the forest and sat in her glen in a big huff. “Huff” she said as she sat down on the soft pine needles. The Great Cat had been nearby, so she came to sit in the shadows and watch the Princess.

”I’m never going to find a good Prince,” exclaimed the Princess, “they are all too young or way too old and I’m going to waste away before a decent Prince manages to come around.” The Great Cat sat further back in the shadows. “Who will run the kingdom? Who will take care of the people of the village?” The Princess continued. “I’m stuck. What good is a Princess without a Prince?”

The Great Cat gave a deep “humphff”.

”What does that mean, that humphff?” asked the Princess directly. “I know you’re there, so you might as well come on out.”

The Great Cat crept closer to the clearing, staying in the shadows but allowing herself to be seen somewhat.

”Oh My! You are a very Great Cat!” The Princess didn’t appear to be upset or scared by the Cat, she seemed very intrigued. “So you humphffed? What does that mean?”

”I think it’s foolish to wait around for a Prince. My kind don’t keep men around very much, they are more trouble than they are worth.” The Great Cat said.

”But who rules your lands?” the Princess asked innocently.

”We do. We take care of it ourselves” said the Great Cat.

”That seems ridiculous. How can you do all of the work of a King or a Prince when you are just a girl” The Princess asked, sincerely but very skeptically.

”Look Princess,” the Great Cat said “they way it works with my people is we keep the men around until we have our babies and then we run them off because they are a pain. They just want to lie around all day and fight with each other and then they want to take most of the food we bring home. So, we run them off. Besides, they are a smelly lot and are just unpleasant” The Great Cat said, settling down for a conversation.

”Well, it’s true that my Father spends a lot of time sort of lying around while my Mom seems to do a lot more of the work. But what will I do if I can’t find a Prince to marry. That’s all I know how to do?” The Princess started sounding kind of whiney to the Great Cat.

”Oh for heaven’s sake! Have you every played a game where you had to stop your opponent from getting to the finishing line and moving yourself further along?” The Great Cat didn’t care for whiners.

”Well yes, and I’m quite good at them.” The Princess puffed up a little.

”Well, there you go. Don’t wait on a Prince, do the job yourself.” The Great Cat was growing bored with the conversation.

”My Dad won’t like this.” The Princess looked somewhat thoughtful.

”Well, do what we do. Growl and hiss at him and if he gets to close smack him with your Great Paw until he sees your way.” The Great Cat was picking up on a scent she didn’t recognize. “Okay, I gotta go. Good luck with everything” and with that the Cat was gone.

”Hmmmm” said the Princess, “I think I could run this village pretty well by myself. But I don’t have a great paw to whack my Dad with.” The Princess got up and wandered back to the castle, deep in thought.

Many weeks went by before the Great Cat saw the Princess again. The summer had faded and fall was creeping into the woods and the birds had begun packing their bags for the trip south.

The Princess went to her usual spot and called out tentatively “Oh Great Cat, if you would please speak to me for a moment.” And the Great Cat crept slowly towards the sunlight. “Yes, Princess, what can I do for you?”

The Princess produced a long stick with a huge hand on the end. “I wanted to show you this.”

The Great Cat studied the stick for some time before saying “Okay, I give up, what is it?”

”Ha! It’s a great hand to smack my Dad with and it works! The growling and hissing didn’t get me very far but creeping up behind him and hitting him on the head with this hand has done wonders for our relationship. I’m beginning to take over parts of the village.”

”See,” The Great Cat said “it works like a charm.”

The Princess and the Cat spent many an afternoon from that point on discussing matters of state and other topics. The Princess turned into a Queen, and later in her life finally found a Farmer that she married after dating a lot of spoiled Princes who only wanted her country and her wealth. The Princess continued to use the great hand technique on her husband. It continued to work like a charm.

The Great Cat continued to protect the woods until the end of her days.